My Rant About Twilight (And Why I Hate Edward Cullen…)

100 thoughts we had while watching all five Twilight movies in a row

So back in 2005 and onward, Stephanie Meyer introduced into the world her Twilight four book saga. Since then, this has become a staple for Young Adult Fantasy Romance that every young teenage girl had read and sided with either Team Jacob or Team Edward. I used to be a fan but I was definitely Team Jacob or the van that should’ve killed her. Or that freaky vampire dude in the first book. I had left this fandom and didn’t want to go back. It was a stupid and toxic fandom that I didn’t want to be apart of since I wasn’t into vampires but rather werewolves and witches. This also became a five movie franchise that even made the fandom even crazier with Taylor Lautner’s shirtless moments and horribly humoring acting from Kristin Stewart. All of my middle school friends were divided on both the book version and the cinematic version as well. 

Everyone has read it and I sadly was into this series but quickly learned the wrong of my ways.

In summary, the four book saga is about Edward Cullen and Bella Swan’s relationship that went on for two years. There was a five movie saga that was based off of the books. The movies are hilariously horrible in a sense that I rather watch Tommy Wiseu’s The Room.

(If my following doesn’t know what that movie is, I highly suggest go buy the DvD copy and watch it. It is a gem that is under appreciated.)

However, Edward was gone for a good seven months. A lot of people might fight me but Edward was the worst character in the entire series. Not even the antagonists. He was ultimately bad. 

Sorry, But Edward Cullen From "Twilight" Is Still Hot

Let me explain before y’all attack me… 

Twilight' by Stephenie Meyer - Book Review

Edward Cullen is a 107 year old vampire when we first are introduced to him and he was acting creepy. He was really cold and distant from Bella. He even told her she smelled bad. Sure he saved her from the van and exposing the fact that he is a supernatural being that is supposed to be in hiding gets less attention from the humans. He put Bella at risk by being friends with her and deciding to hang out with her despite that it was a bad idea. They take her with the rest of the Cullen clan to go play baseball and then the discount and scary black eye peas show up (lol their names are James, Laurent, and Victoria). They smell Bella and begin to hunt her. The Cullen clan took Bella far away and didn’t allow her to say anything to her dad other than she was going back to live with her mom which is another bad thing that Edward made her do because of his own selfish decisions. This is only book one sadly.

New Moon (twilight Saga) (paperback) By Stephenie Meyer : Target

In book two, Edward decided to break up with her and didn’t even bother taking her home. No. HE LEFT HER IN THE FOREST. She became suicidal since Edward decided to leave town for her safety and his own sanity. She became close with Jacob and yet she couldn’t stop thinking about him. This made her jump off a cliff causing Edward’s adopted sister Alice to see that she was dead. Edward decided to go expose himself to humans in hopes of getting the attention of the evil yet ominous group of vampires called the Volturi, whose sole existence is to exterminate any vampire that causes chaos in the human world. She goes to stop him and has to make a deal with these horrible scary vampire groupies that she would become a vampire. Edward doomed her very existence again with his selfish decisions. 

In the third book, Bella is in danger again because in the first book he killed James and this made Victoria, his love and partner, pissed off. Laurant comes to warn them all and goes away. Jacob tries to be the good friend and protect Bella by telling her that he is the better option but Edward stops their friendship (and possible relationship) by hosting a pissing contest. At the end of the third book, Bella is engaged to Edward. I fucking hated this. I wanted her with her best friend since diapers to be with her instead of this cold lifeless blood sucking monster. 

Breaking Dawn: Meyer, Stephenie: 9781907410352: Amazon.com: Books

In the fourth one, Jacob tries to convince Bella that she is going to be making the worst decision of her life by marrying Edward. He is and was right. Marrying Edward would lead to her being bruised and pregnant at the end of their very short honeymoon. Their honeymoon was her trying to be smexy but couldn’t be. In the film Kristin Stewart’s acting was just horribly funny and yet awkward. Not only that but the demonic seed that made a demon spawn in her decides to tear her apart like a kid breaking open the pinata at a birthday party. She was forced into becoming a vampire to save her life. (Do not read the book or watch if one has a weak stomach because in it was a very graphic description of how Edward broke her water in order to save the demon child in the movie it’s also nasty)

All in all, Edward was gaslighting and was manipulating her throughout. He couldn’t stand that Jacob was the better person and did things that made her ultimately be forever in a doomed relationship cause now she’s married to Edward, their both vampire parents with a child that is half human and half vampire. Bella is not a great character either given that she ditched her friends to go ride on a motorcycle in hopes of seeing Edward once more. Not only that but was really suicidal over a boy and couldn’t see that Jacob was there for her. Jacob was the best character out of the entire series and he deserved so much more than that imprint situation that happened in the final book.

I hate Edward and I thought Stephanie Meyer, if you’re reading this, do not write any more for this series. If you do, write an alternative ending where Bella married Jacob instead. I will be gladly handing over my wallet. Lol. jk.

I do not mean harm to the author. I loved that she gave the world this book and I know folks do enjoy it. I did enjoy it and grew out of this phase. I do understand that I am ranting about the series. However, do not be discouraged from reading this nor don’t feel judged for reading this. Read what ever makes you happy and be apart of any fandom where you feel welcomed in.

Creepy YA Novel

Twilight – Stephanie Mayer

Young adult, fiction, romance, mythology, vampires, werewolves, teenagers, drama

Rating 2/10

This infamous book, “Twilight” by Stephanie Mayer, is about a teenager falling for a vampire. Bella Swan meets Edward Cullen at a high school and he is, at first, not intrigued by her. After an incident of a near death experience, Bella seeks out Edward to see what he is. Even when he reveals what he is, a vampire, she isn’t afraid of him. Family friend of her dad’s and childhood best friend both warn her about the Cullens but fail to take that advice. He introduces her to his family and they like her to a certain extent. Then, another coven of vampires’ trespass on the Cullen’s land one of them caught scent of Bella who is human and thus begins to hunt her down. It takes the entire Cullen coven to protect Bella. Bella gets nearly turned or killed by a vampire and she is rescued by Edward once again.

I never truly understood the whole hype of the Twilight series when it first came out. I only had read this because I was intrigued by mythological creatures such as werewolves and vampires. I didn’t like Mayer’s depiction of vampires because it goes against the lore. However, I had been a sucker for the series and read all of them in one swift binge reading fest. I was sort of hoping she would’ve fallen for her childhood best friend because he seemed normal. What creeped me out is that an older vampire, who is one hundred and seven-year-old, was in love with a seventeen-year-old. Talk about pedophilia. I had seen the movies and the movies could’ve been better if someone else played Bella Swan. Not sorry Kristen Stewart. Sadly I do not do movie reviews as I am not big on movies.

Meyer, Stephenie. Twilight. Little, Brown and Co., 2007.